
Tuesday nights is poetry night at the Embargo Club. I feel comfortable there on Tuesday nights and early afternoons when only a few happy hour regulars are there and when Jem the bartender is present.
Jem interests me for many reasons but the most important is his hidden intelligence behind all the bantering of keeping people in a bar happy. I think we hit it off because we both come from a Catholic family, went to a parochial school and he loves history and different kinds of cultures. He has a degree so I can't figure out why he's doing what he's doing but I'm not comfortable asking.
I like feeling safe and wanted so it's been nice that the other poets appreciate my bits and pieces and take the time to tell me so in person. Jem says I need to speak up more on the mic because my voice doesn't carry well in there but that's about it for criticism. Today I finished a piece, I wrote about a week and half ago but only tonight rewrote the last half. It's surprising when you're creating a conversation with yourself and you surprise yourself with a emotional breakthrough!
*Duncan hasn't responded to my sentimental post. I emailed him and IM but still no response...so it goes! Be oh, so careful what you ask for...
At this moment, and probably later, I feel angry and hurt and of course like a first class ass! I read what I wrote and I think...was she drinking? What rubbish! Highly emotional, he would say...and he would be right as I drew from his quiet ways, helped me stabilized my Emily Dickens soppy thoughts. Tiz embarrassing to be melodramatic when the lights come on! I cried, then reread his angry post again.
It was all in my mind, the true love thing I mean. Never had he given me more than the moment he was with me...he actually gave much more than he should have because he truly is a good man. I just wanted the dream to be real.
Jem interests me for many reasons but the most important is his hidden intelligence behind all the bantering of keeping people in a bar happy. I think we hit it off because we both come from a Catholic family, went to a parochial school and he loves history and different kinds of cultures. He has a degree so I can't figure out why he's doing what he's doing but I'm not comfortable asking.
I like feeling safe and wanted so it's been nice that the other poets appreciate my bits and pieces and take the time to tell me so in person. Jem says I need to speak up more on the mic because my voice doesn't carry well in there but that's about it for criticism. Today I finished a piece, I wrote about a week and half ago but only tonight rewrote the last half. It's surprising when you're creating a conversation with yourself and you surprise yourself with a emotional breakthrough!
*Duncan hasn't responded to my sentimental post. I emailed him and IM but still no response...so it goes! Be oh, so careful what you ask for...
At this moment, and probably later, I feel angry and hurt and of course like a first class ass! I read what I wrote and I think...was she drinking? What rubbish! Highly emotional, he would say...and he would be right as I drew from his quiet ways, helped me stabilized my Emily Dickens soppy thoughts. Tiz embarrassing to be melodramatic when the lights come on! I cried, then reread his angry post again.
It was all in my mind, the true love thing I mean. Never had he given me more than the moment he was with me...he actually gave much more than he should have because he truly is a good man. I just wanted the dream to be real.
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